I spent some time with a mom of young boys yesterday. She has a difficult relationship with her extended family. The relationship causes tension at every visit. Part of the reason she is pushing through that tension is to maintain the relationship out of love and respect for them. I was impressed with that attitude. The other part of her reason is that she wants to “teach her boys how to maintain family relationships as adults”. Her dream is to have healthy, authentic, loving relationships with her adult boys and their future wives. When she got totally transparent about it, she wants to model to her boys what she hopes she will get in return when they have families of their own.
My concern for her was that she was putting her hopes on a return from the wrong investment. My advice to her was this….the relationship you have with your adult children and their spouses is far more dependent on what you build with them individually when they are adults. Be intentional about those relationships, for the return she was hoping for.
Our adult children are amazing kids and have married incredibly awesome spouses. That is one of my greatest blessings in life. I will never take for granted the fact that being intentional about those relationships is so important. The return on that investment is priceless. Anyway….”it has worked for me.”
it has worked for me 
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